Letters to Owen #1

Dear Owen   

Today you are five and a half weeks old. That's 39 days, if you're interested. According to the Internets, I'm supposed to write these letters to you on some kind of schedule, like every week, or every month, but I just know that wouldn't work out, and I'd forget one month, and then it would stop all together. So I'll write when I feel like it, okay?

Right now, you are snuggled up against my chest, asleep in your wrap.

That's one of the only ways that you will fall asleep. Sometimes you fall asleep with your head on a shoulder, sometimes rocking in your daddy's or my arms. Sometimes after you've eaten, you lay your head on my chest like a pillow and smile a little sleep smile. You also enjoy falling asleep sitting up, being bounced on a knee. Cause that sure puts me to sleep - bouncing up and down with my head lolling to one side - you're a weird kid!

Notice how all or your favourite ways to fall asleep involve someone holding you?

Yeah, I'd noticed that too. I don't mind, most of the time. It's what your daddy and I hoped would happen, that you would develop such a strong attachment to us. But I'll admit, it can be tiring for us. Thank goodness for babywearing (the wrap, the sling, the mei tie, the 30-year-old snuglie that I fell asleep in once-upon-a-time, you love them all).

 

And then today, I decided to try you out in your baby swing again. Now this is a swing we purchased about a month ago, in desperation, hoping you would love it. Right. You hated it, and proceeded to scream every time we put you in it. We packed it away, hoping that you would grow to like it sometime when you were older. You were crying when I put you in it, but I decided to wait it out for a couple of minutes. I stoop beside the swing and talked to you, and miraculously, you quieted down! You started crying again, and I gave you your 'soose', and you quieted down again. And then, you my astonishment, you fell asleep! 

I couldn't believe it. That is the first time in your short life that you have fallen asleep without being in someone's arms. It is a relief to your mommy and daddy! We won't use it to often, because I do love to walk around the house tidying up with your sweet smelling little head nestled against my heart as you snooze happily in the baby carrier. But sometimes, the swing will be good.

You are so adorable. You have these chubby cheeks, and a cute little chin, a perfect little nose (you get that from me) and the most beautiful big eyes. You are very good at holding your head up on your own, and you kick like a champ. Your 'awake alert' times are getting longer and more frequent, and you are so interested in everything around you. This week you started smiling!

You look at me for about three minutes, staring intently, and then you break into a huge grin. It's just the reward I need, what with the waking up 6 times a night and the fussiness.

Yeah, so about that fussiness- it can be a bit much sometimes, especially when daddy is working the evening shift and I'm on my own with you. We are pretty sure you have gas pains and we've been giving you some special drops to help your tummy digest your milk better. I think it's helping. You're getting older and bigger all the time, and the fussiness is getting less and less. Every so often you have an evening when you scream at the top of your lungs for an hour or so. I just tell myself you're hurting, and crying is all you know how to do. I wish I could make you all better when that happens.

Your daddy and I love you so much. It is so much fun to wake up in the morning and see your bright eyes looking up at us. Your daddy is really good at changing your diapers, and he loves to dance around with you and sing. He's also an expert at the knee bouncing trick.

 You love to go for rides in the car and on the subway. We’ve had many adventures. You’re always so quiet when we’re out – you usually sleep in your carrier or your car seat for most of the trip. We’ve been to the toy store, and the grocery store, to the coffee shop and to the mall. We’ve been to the bookstore many times, and this morning we even went out for breakfast. The other day I took you on a trip to my office. Wherever I go, people want to look at you. Everyone is so impressed with how much hair you have, and how cute you are.

I think that’s a good place to end this letter – with your cuteness. It is unparalleled.